Bhupendra - London
July 22nd, 2008 by mynation
Name: Bhupendra
Comments: Hi
I, my wife and our child(3 yrs) recently recieved British citizenship. I am the only one with OCI as well. Due to time constraints my wife and our child had to apply for visit visa to india. We thought that they can apply for OCI once we come back from India(Hyderabad). My dad was due to under go a surgery soon in india i had to be there.
I have not been speaking to my wife’s parents for a while for the disrespect they have shown for my parents. My wife has always been a good supporter of her parents even for any bad deeds.
During our stay in hyderabad at my parents place, she wanted to visit her parents for second time and i did not allow her to take our child along on that occassion. Her parents turned up next day and had sweet conversation with me and assured me that my wife will return 3 days before our journey back to UK and took my child along.
I waited and she did not turn up, when i phoned she started threatning of filing a 498a against me and give up british citizenship as well unless i help her father in finding a NRI groom(as he needs to get 2 younger daughters married to well settled persons), and also ask an apology to her family members for not maintaining good relationship. I being short tempered, refused to do so. I came back to UK as had to join back at work(i already took 45 days off) and was already on unpaid leave for couple of days. Return tickets for my child and wife were wasted.
My parents back in India are worried of getting arrested any time, in case she files a 498a. Now am alone in UK, missing my daughter, extreme financial deficit(debts due to business loss in the past), creditors sending court notices. I feel like commiting sucide. I am unable to bear the fact that i looked after my wife very well and she in turn is treating me harsh under her parents influence. I am cosidering filing a police case in uk saying that i am being threatened and being seperated from my child.
Please suggest.
Thanks
Bhupendra
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Posted in Victims |
July 23rd, 2008 at 2:48 am
your parents need to meet a advocate (preferably a known advocate). Normally advocates will want to wait untill the opposite party files a complaint. But since this 498A (legal terrosim) goes for a arrest. Let your advocate and parents have a discussion to avoid any harrasment. If you can take them with you is the best. Save money to face the expenses. As far as you get Anticipatory bail for your parents after they file 498A then she has to prove in the court the dowry taken , if you have really not demanded or taken then fight it (false cases wont stand).There is no hurry for you to come to India(delay as far as possible).
July 23rd, 2008 at 5:26 am
This point about keeping a tape recorder to record the threats is very important as many crooks leave much evidence to go in their own grave. So follow that method for now.
Peace - UK
July 23rd, 2008 at 5:28 am
Start recording her threats. A good recorder will cost less than a lawyer’s fees. That alone can help you a lot in the future.
Peace - UK
July 23rd, 2008 at 5:52 am
WITHOUT PREJUDICE
SOME QUICK INFORMATION FOR YOU.
This information has been read at another link:
“note that false criminal charges are a crime, and therefore consider investigating, or charging those who issue these false requests.”
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You have said, “I waited and she did not turn up, when i phoned she started threatning of filing a 498a against me and give up british citizenship as well unless i help her father in finding a NRI groom(as he needs to get 2 younger daughters married to well settled persons), and also ask an apology to her family members for not maintaining good relationship. I being short tempered, refused to do so. I came back to UK as had to join back at work(i already took 45 days off) and was already on unpaid leave for couple of days. Return tickets for my child and wife were wasted”
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So fight on. UK police can help you when threats come up to a UK citizen(yourself) specially from a lady who has just been issued with UK citizenship and now does not seem to value it.
Divorce from UK is also possible even if she is now in India. But they can go for another divorce from India also as it seems that the two of you might have got married in India. But that UK divorce can be your good back up. And the UK divorce can allow you to remarry again but leave out that option for a while.
Some points have been given to you here so you start to think of options available. Don’t lose your sleep. If all works out in your favour, she might end up staying in India and your child can join you in UK. Contact a lawyer in UK who understands the India law also.
Many of us are not able to return to India for such fears of false accusations where the cases can take about 6-7 years and that also without much of an end in sight. You have to realise that you are a UK citizen and so can get proper protection from the law in UK.
YOU NEED TO ACT VERY QUICK.
YOU CAN ALSO CONTACT THE NEAREST SOCIAL SERVICES, CITIZENS’ ADVICE BUREAU, YOUR MANAGER AT WORK PLACE WHO CAN GUIDE YOU TO THE NEAREST ORGANISATIONS WHO CAN TALK TO YOU WHILE YOU SEEM TO BE FEELING SO LOW.
IN UK MOST EMPLOYERS HAVE SPECIALIST PEOPLE WHO KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH SUCH TYPE OF CASES IN THE MOST SYMPATHETIC MANNER.
Peace - UK
July 23rd, 2008 at 8:28 am
You seem to be self employed which I am gathering after reading your notes again. Not the end of the world. A good accounted can keep the creditors informed. A good lawyer can guide you to proper establishments who can talk to you to calm your nerves while you are going through this difficult time. Much more information already placed here for you earlier.
Very soon you can start to realise that all is not as bad as you have been thinking.
Government financial assistance can be available to you in case need arises and that your lawyer can explain to you. See gentleman, still you might be thinking that the Indian harassment methods as you might have read in other cases here will take place in UK too. Have firm confidence in the UK methods which can protect you from the complications which might be driving you to the edge.
Peace - UK
July 23rd, 2008 at 5:39 pm
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=4291899106996539780